When you feel unlovable it hits you like a sledge hammer knocking you to the ground. You instantly connect and remember every time you felt rejected, abandoned, left behind, ignored. You also remembered the times you pushed people away as if the idea of loving you was preposterous or just incredibly uncomfortable. Thus begins the dark tale…
The rollercoaster journey is life, I suppose. One minute you are riding the wave, you feel on top of the world, experiencing a natural high. Synchronicities take place, connections, ideas, discoveries. It can even be as simple as lying on the grass, stargazing with your partner or a friend.
Bliss. Magic.
It was in the seventies. I was lying on the grass with a friend, gazing up at the starry night, looking for shooting stars. I could hear our families by the firepit at our camp site. I remember the thought clearly.
“I wish this could last forever.”
I knew the end of summer was near and I wanted to hang on to the feeling, under the stars.
Yet everything passes, even the uncomfortable feelings that come up on occasion. Noticing, not judging, has been key.
During these challenging times, many of us will face our shadow, yet again. We may feel sleepy, weepy or depressed. We may become anxious, obsessed, worried, afraid. At times we may feel energized, driven, creative, inspired. We may feel all of it, none of it.
No matter what you are feeling, acceptance without judgement has brought a sense of peace, surrender.
Like the glorious days of summer, this too shall pass. Hang in there.