Labels are the theme of the week for me and I felt it important to take it a step further. Let’s talk about narcissism.

I don’t know about you but lately I see it everywhere. Things like:

•  How to deal with a narcissistic ex.

•  How I dealt with my narcissistic mother in law.

•  How to protect yourself from narcissistic abuse.

It seems to be a very trendy word these days! In addition, everywhere we look, we can find an us vs. them mentality. It takes place at work, in politics, religion, the home, the news or in social media.  Creating a “them”  may provide a sense of comfort or belonging but it doesn’t necessarily bring inner peace.

As I’ve written already this week, labeling others creates more division.

It also reinforces victimhood. The story may say otherwise, like how they learned how to speak up, walk away or take a stand but there is still the subtlety that they are the good guy and the “narcissist” is the bad guy.

I like to practice taking a different approach, very imperfectly of course. Simply, it takes two to tango and if we are in a specific situation it’s not an accident.  “What is this bringing up for me?” is a common question I ask.

We are all made from the same stuff and are having a very human experience. We have not walked in another’s shoes. Labeling another dehumanizes them.

Relationships are mirrors. Partners reflect back what needs healing or addressing. So if we are triggered, we have just found something within us that needs looking at in some way.

Nobody is perfect. We all carry love and a shadow within ourselves. The key is to learn how to accept all of ourselves so we are able to extend the same love to others. We are not free if we are harboring resentment in any way. True freedom is when we no longer feel triggered but have found true inner peace in our lives.

That doesn’t mean accepting the unacceptable. It does mean doing the inner work and taking responsibility for our outer reality and making a decision to grow or heal.

Check out my course The Soulmates Path for further exploration.

Do no harm.