You, Me, We

Do you remember the story of the boy who was taught to fear strangers that when “strangers” were trying to rescue him in the woods, he hid? How many articles have you read to stay away from “toxic people” and “narcissists?” There is such a level of us vs them (division) in our world we …

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sitting on the bench

Relationships: Friendships

There is a story I tell myself. It goes something like this. Friends will disappoint you, leave you, hurt you . . . it always happens. And sure, if I focus on this story or believe this story then it continues to manifest over and over again. Or does it? At times I have felt …

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working together to untangle our knot

Us against Them mentality at its Peak

Wherever I look, I see memes, articles or quotes telling us not to let THEM get to us. Most of the time, it is disguised as a motivational message. But in many instances, there is a sense that you need to rise above THEM, whatever THEM is being referenced. Don’t let THEM get to you. …

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Relationships: Mirror Factor

The first time I experienced the mirror factor, was over 25 years ago. In doing an activity on forgiveness and what I was hurt by, and writing it all out, I realized that I had done something similar to others. I was blown away. I realized that in seeing myself in others, in some way, I …

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Kim and Will Soulmates

Relationships: The mirror

I am coming up on 20 years of marriage and 23 years together. In looking back, I am most grateful that Will didn’t quit on me. I am most grateful for the mentors and teachers along the way. When I would cry my eyes out and blame him for this or that, I was guided …

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marriage

 Marriage

  Throughout the years I’ve observed many a partnership failing because he/she was too this or that or not enough of this or that. Or simply, because the magic died. We have been together 22 years and I realize that it was never about my partner. It was always about me and my beliefs, thoughts …

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memory

Relationships: Us vs. Them

The us vs. them mentality just doesn’t work and it leaves us in a perpetual state of victimhood and duality. It is much harder, yet more empowering and rewarding, when we take our issues directly to the source of our discontent and have a crucial conversation with positive intent. What positive intent means is this. …

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Relationships: Intimacy, the dance…

Many fear intimacy. The answer is simple. If we don’t love ourselves completely, it is very difficult to love another. When I met my husband so long ago I was terrified. He was loving and kind. His love was so intense I thought there must be something wrong with him. Clearly, my tolerance for love …

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